We’re human, so let’s make that an advantage

There’s a lot to “love” about the way AI chatbots sound (and that includes the sound of their writing):

• They’re smooth,
• They’re well-informed (or think they are; check out Sonya Renee Taylor’s brilliant discussion of how this mimics patriarchal culture :-)), and
• They always sound confident.

Come to think of it, isn’t that just what we human beings want to sound like? Smooth, well-informed, and confident? (“Come to think of it” is a phrase you won’t hear bots “say,” unless prompted, because they don’t think!)

In fact, many of us worked on sounding that way during the early stages of our jobs or careers.

So chatbots are programmed to imitate us. Then, by using language that we’ve been programmed to think sounds professional, we inadvertently imitate them.

You could think of it as a quirky (or maybe perverted) virtuous circle; but why is that a problem?

Well, the problem is that…

You can take this “sounding good” thing too far!

In a recent newsletter, I gave three examples of statements that are smooth, well-informed, and confident. (They’re also remarkably bland.)

It was a pleasure to attend this outstanding conference.

Your response is urgently needed before the end of our fiscal year.

Residents in the region were urged to remain indoors, weeks after similarly dangerous air choked the Northeast

These sentences were probably written by people. But it’s hard to be sure, because—aside from that lovely image of the Northeast choking—they don’t have the individuality that makes us sound human.

There’s nothing to distinguish the age, race, gender, region, attitude, or personality of whoever wrote them.

They could literally have been written by anyone.

Why do we bleed individuality out of our speech and writing?

Why, indeed?

First, we believe that we’re expected to “tone it down,” i.e., to sound less like people and more like cogs in a workplace wheel—and, often, that’s true. (More on this below.)

But there are also personal reasons to hide behind “anyone could say this” language; for instance:

• We really don’t have the time or attention to focus on what we’re saying, so we fall back on automatically using the language (and clichés) of our workplaces,

• We’re overly concerned with “sounding professional,” and less concerned with sounding personal, and

• We’re trying to impress people with how we’re smart, sophisticated, or—whatever. (That quick dip in and out of slang is something I haven’t seen a chatbot do…yet!)

These are very human motivations, and there’s nothing wrong with occasionally sounding a little “canned,” glib, or chatbot-ish.

But problems occur when that’s the only way we know how to sound — when we’ve forgotten how to just talk to people in a work or business context.

Get Back to Sounding Like Yourself

If you think you’ve begun to sound like a chatbot, here are some tips for reversing that trend:

Listen to yourself when you’re talking to friends.

What makes you sound distinctive (different from them)?

• Do you use long or short sentences?
• Dramatic pauses?
• Slang or street language?
• Do you tell stories?
• Act out the different parts (imitate how different people in the story speak)?
• Do you talk more about feelings, strategies, or ideas?
• Do you express your feelings in casual conversation?

Whatever your answers to these and a thousand other questions, they point toward things that—believe it or not—you’re allowed to do in business conversation. (Not for the entire conversation, but occasionally. :-))

Check out your attitude.

Past a certain point, if you’re changing yourself to fit in with the people around you, chances are that you—or they!—don’t think your real self is “good enough” for them.

Sadly, this is sometimes true. People in your workplace can be just as classist, racist, ageist, nationalistic, etc., as people in general.

But if you don’t have actual evidence that your true self will be judged unacceptable in your particular working environment, this is an idea you can test in real time, by doing the following exercise:

Filter a little bit of real you into work encounters.

Just as a shy or introverted person may decide to speak up once in every meeting, you can decide to drop one example of your personal speaking style into every business conversation.

You can add a little more flavor or color than you usually would (for me, that sounds like, “OK, hold on everyone…”, or “What, are you guys kidding me????!!!”) and see how people react.

If nobody clutches their pearls, keep doing it until you find a line that it doesn’t make sense to cross. (“Oops, sorry about that f-bomb.”)

And yes, I do realize that for me—as an older, well-educated, white, self-employed person—this experiment is much less risky than it can be for others.

But this is literally how I found my own style of individual-yet-acceptable work speech when I was young, inexperienced, and employed by others, so you may want to give it a try.

And Finally: Here’s What ChatGPT Says about Sounding Like a Chatbot

Since I couldn’t resist posing this question to ChatGPT, I’ll close with what it had to say about the difference between artificial and human speech:

…[H]uman speech possesses a unique essence, including nuanced vocal expressions and authentic emotions, which sets it apart from the artificial articulation of chatbots.

—ChatGPT

To paraphrase country singer Johnny Paycheck, put that in your AI and shove it. 🙂